It Won't Be Like This for Long...

Let me just start by saying that I have been extremely sentimental and sappy lately. Many times I tear up for no apparent reason, other than the fact that my baby is growing to be a big girl (and pregnancy hormones I guess!) That alone is reason enough, right??

I mean seriously... she looks like a teenager with car keys here!

I was running the other day and Darius Rucker's song "It Won't Be Like This for Long". I bought this song off of Itunes 2 years ago for Justin for his first Father's Day. The song came on and I have heard it many times and it's one of my favs, but I pressed repeat and listened to it at least 3 times in a row before giving Mr. Rucker a break and moving to the next song.

So, there I am running, crying (not sobbing... but you get the picture!) thinking about my little girl. A part of me would do anything to push the pause button on life (even though we are anticipating a special arrival from a very special little boy :) to soak up EVERYTHING about this stage of Sienna's life. She is a hoot, plain and simple. Everyday I find myself amazed and absolutely head over heels in love with her. So many times lately Justin or I find ourselves randomly saying, "I just LOVE her!!" The feeling is indescribable. She is honestly more than I could have ever dreamed of in a million years, as cliche as it sounds, this mama means every word. She is lovey, cuddly, smart as a whip, cute as a button (see for yourself), and goofy with quite the sense of humor!

I think often times as parents, when things are hard with our kids, it is easy to think, "Oh it will be so fun when they can fill in the blank. It is nothing done intentionally, but it often anticipates the next phase without taking in the moments where you are at. And sometimes those moments where we are at are much easier to be wished away than to accept that "it won't be like this for long" and that it shall, too, pass. I can quite honestly say, I would be okay if Sienna were this age forever :) I have found myself saying so much, "I don't want her to grow up!!"
She always asks to read to Macy... so here she is showing her the pictures (upside down... but we won't tell!)


On the flip side, with 10 weeks to go before our baby boy gets here, this song also reminds me of the bare-bone amount of sleep that you get during those first few weeks (or months!), the exhaustion, the emotions, the struggles of "figuring it all out". I know that I am going to need to remind myself daily (scratch that-- maybe hourly) that "it won't be like this for long". And instead soak up the chaos and the craziness that will eventually lessen until shortly we find ourselves as empty-nesters...

To be honest, there are days I wake up scared silly about the adjustment. However, there are also so many nights where I am sitting there feeling his little elbows, feet, and knees moving across my belly where I am just dying to hold this little guy in my arms and see his sweet face... to have some snuggle time with this little life that is so precious. One thing that makes me anxious for the change is I want Sienna to feel incredibly, without-a-doubt, absolutely loved and special. I want her to feel like our special girl, important and cared for. I fear being inadequate for the job, whether that being a mother of two or a wife to a tremendously amazing man!

"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." -2 Corinthians 12:9

Wow- aren't you thankful that's the case? He's got our backs during our darkest, hardest days. Days where we feel completely inadequate for the task at hand.

Well, I better wipe these tears and get my little gal going for the day. :) Thanks for reading, friends.